moving on.

comment/add/talk to me on my new one,

lifebeatsfaster.

i want comments, feedback, stuff, this time. you know.

i know people can see this.

please if you're listening,

talk to me.

thanks.

jess.

it stung to see your name up on my screen,

saying "hey! i've forgotten about you, too."

as if replaced on a shelf like a broken doll.

I felt a lot for you, for some reason the distance between two people doesn't matter when you've found someone you trust with your whole entire heart. and for some reason, my friend, i trusted you so much.

you didn't know me for who i really am.

*if i dont get comments this is bust. i agree - i want to be a writer, not poor on the streets begging for bananas. :)

criticism and comments will only get me there faster.

so tell me

there isnt much to say but.

maybe she should stop trying to feel everything. feel heart beats, the way the air is sticky and hot, and the way you kiss too quick or too slow. she should stop watching time tick by her and start realizing this is the only time she has left.

vultures pick and pry at their prey, stabbing at it with its blackened beak. it hunts its satisfaction down, making sure it finds the right one before it lurches down and smothers the victim with itself, ingulfing it completely and taking it over. it snaps at the pieces of the flith it doesn't want, discarding everything that it doesn't need or doesn't like. it keeps itself happy, this way. judging its prey like i (don't) judge you. i, for one, am not a vulture.

what.

you never realize what you get yourself into until you look at it on the surface. i guess. thats how it is with me, anyway. i cant keep fishing through, filtering through all the lies and who im supposed to trust. and i cant keep losing friends because you make poor judgements. i can't keep pretending to be happy because it makes everyone else think its okay. i'm not an actor, i dont want to be in the spotlight. i dont like having people watch my every move.

i can't keep relying on the unreliable i still cling to like i have nothing else left.

but the truth is, i dont.

i  want to get rid of this xanga simply because its old. :| thats terrible isnt it?